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The Bum’s Rush #48
And Sometimes I Write Comics
Did you know I write comics? You did? WHO TOLD YOU!? I’LL
KILL ‘EM… I’LL… oh, it was me? Well that’s all right then.
So yes, I write comics. Correction – sometimes I
write comics. I mean, it’s been my fondest dream since I was
just a wee lad. Even in high school, when I thought that I
wanted to be a comic artist, what I really wanted was to
write comics. It should have been obvious to me back then. I
was always filling notebooks full of ideas, new characters
and stories when I might have better spent my time studying
for a math test I probably failed or paying attention in
American History. Whatever. Who needs to read a book to know
that Columbo discovered America in 1826 while on the run
from the Chinese mafia? But the god’s honest truth is that
I’ve probably spent more time writing about wanting to write
comics than actually writing them.
About the time
Aaron Hall and I were cooking up our latest
batch of drugs in a homemade meth lab the idea for
Stumblebum Studios, I had also started my own
blog and was writing pretty regularly, churning out
short stories, comic scripts and rants about Oprah. But as I
began to get more heavily involved in the development of
this website, as well as producing a semi-daily webcomic
called
Der Wundervolle Bean, I found it increasingly
difficult to focus on writing stories and scripts. At this
point I almost feel as if I am at a complete standstill
where my fictional writing endeavors are concerned. I could
say that it was a lack of time or perhaps a lack of energy.
Maybe it was German midgets, sapping me of my will to
create. Who knows? Truthfully, I think it’s just plain
laziness. But that German midget thing is something to think
about.
See, I’m still getting used to actually being productive all
the time. For the first 24 useless years of my life I
accomplished very little. Granted, from the age of 2 – 12
one is not exactly expected to be out changing the world, or
even producing publishable comic books. What about 13 – 18?
Well, you may not know it, but teenager actually comes from
the Greek word teenakos, which means, "one who is
lazy, hateful, selfish and is generally pimply faced, damn
kids”. But by 19 or 20 you’d think I ought to be getting
something done. Blame it on my depression (which I’ve since
conquered), German midgets, laziness, what have you. At
least I’m finally being proactive, helping design, manage
and contribute to this website, doing a regular comic strip
(at least 4 times a week), attending comic conventions (as a
guest no less!), all the while working a full time job and
doing freelance design projects on the side. I think what
I’ve accomplished over the last few years is something to be
proud of. But I’m still not doing everything I can.
I have to keep pushing myself. I have to make myself more
productive. I have to get used to being busy all the time
and staying that way. I can’t let myself feel too content,
can’t rest on my laurels too long, not if I want to get to
the next level! With that in mind I am, as per usual,
approaching the challenge in completely the wrong way. I’m
piling tons of projects onto my plate, assigning different
levels of importance to absolutely none of them. But don’t
cry for me. I realized this week that I am slowly, but
surely, learning how to cope with juggling multiple projects
at one time. If I didn’t know me better, and I like to think
I know me pretty well, I’d think an alien might have
replaced me.
Anyway, enough of that boring crap. I know what you all came
here for. To learn how to make a bomb using everyday
household items. No? Oh, you actually want to hear about
some of these marvelous and mind-blowing projects I’m
working on, do you? Of course you do. How silly of me. Well,
just look here… and be amazed!
Twilight: High Moon
It’s a western… with werewolves. That’s how I usually
describe it to anyone foolish enough to ask. You’ve never
heard of such a strange and bizarre mix of genre’s have
you!? You… you have? They’re doing them all over the place?
Yeah, yeah. This concept may seem somewhat overdone,
considering the multitude of western comics with a horror
bent that seem to have cropped up over the last few years.
But believe me when I tell you, when we first developed this
idea there was nothing else like it on the shelves. And
looking at the story we came up with, which involves a pair
of rough and tough monster hunters hired to track and kill a
pack of werewolves that are terrorizing a small town in
Texas, I still think it stands out a bit.
Twilight is the first comic I ever wrote. Not the first one
I ever created, but the first one I actually took the time
to develop and actually complete. My co-writer, the
aforementioned Aaron Hall, and I spent months cooking up the
plot for this book and went almost completely mad in the
process. Okay… not almost. We went completely mad. But
things are cool now. The doctors said so.
Writing the actual scripts for the five-issue mini-series
was surprisingly painless, probably due to the exhaustive
amount of plotting we did beforehand. Almost every facet of
the story had been talked about and discussed and hammered
out before we ever started scripting the first issue. We
took turns writing the scripts themselves. Aaron would write
one script and then pass it off to me. I would then write a
second draft based on Aaron’s script and pass it back to
him. This continued until we were both pleased. Or until one
of us threatened the other with bodily harm. Whichever came
first.
I think the most fun I ever had writing anything was when
Aaron and his buddy Chris (the most powerful man alive!)
came over to my apartment and we wrote the final script
together. Aaron sat at my computer, typing the actual words,
while I paced back and forth smoking cigarette after
cigarette and frantically acting out what a fight between a
cowboy and a werewolf might look like. Chris stared on in
amazement… and horror, occasionally giving his opinion on a
particular piece of dialogue or action. The creative give
and take was a thrill. The whole thing was a blast and the
most perfect way I could imagine to finish writing what will
probably be one of the most collaborative stories of my
life.
Since then there have been tremendous spurts of activity on
the book, followed by prolonged periods of f***-all getting
done. Progress on the book has never quite been at a
standstill but it’s never moved quite as fast as I’d prefer
either. Our creative team has gone through numerous changes.
We’ve switched artists at least once. We’ve gained and lost
inkers and letterers. But we keep pushing forward, getting a
little bit more done all the time. At least I can say that
there is constantly forward progress on the book. Our
current artist, the irreplaceable (so far)
Kevin Steele, is pretty much the perfect artist for the
book. Not necessarily the fastest, but he’s certainly the
best artist you might never have heard of before. He’s just
wrapped up penciling and inking the first issue of the book
and let me tell you sir (or madam) it looks spectacular!
Since the inception of this little book there has been so
much blood, sweat and tears put into the making of it. It’s
a book that is done purely for the love of doing it. When it
finally hits shelves (which it will, make no mistake about
it) I think that love will show. I guarantee (not a
guarantee) that it’ll be the coolest story about cowboys
fighting werewolves in a small Texas town you ever read in
your life! Or at the very least, it will entertain you and
hopefully bring a smile to your cute little face.
An interesting side note – the book’s subtitle, High Moon,
was suggested by PVP creator
Scott
Kurtz and inker extraordinaire
Jaime Mendoza. As it was told to me, Kevin was out
drinking with these guys one night when he mentioned our
book and what it was about. Scott and Jaime jokingly
suggested that High Moon (get it?) was a far superior
title to Twilight. Then Kevin mumbled something about
police and a dead vagrant or something. I don’t really know
because I was too busy pondering the wisdom spoken by Scott
and Jaime. Whether they were joking or not, High Moon
was indeed an excellent title! Since Aaron and I were
planning (and still are) to do more Twilight stories
in the future we thought the idea of adding High Moon
as a subtitle was akin to the invention of the wheel or
perhaps even sliced cheese! So there you go, yet more proof
that every great idea owes its existence to the miracle of
inebriation. Or something.
Zombie City: Down Among the Dead Men
Zombie City exists for one simple reason. I love
zombies. Zombie movies. Zombie comics. Zombie pornogr… uh…
never mind. Oh, and also I needed a five-page story for the
Stumblebum Studios Anthology. Two! Zombie City
exists for TWO simple reasons. But the chief reason is the
love of zombies I mentioned. I created Zombie City
because I wanted to see if I could do a good zombie story,
plain and simple. The concept revolves around a
post-zombie-apocalypse-type world where the zombies have
finally been defeated, the remainder of the walking dead
being pushed back and walled up inside the burnt out
remnants of New York City. The only trouble with that is a
number of living people were also trapped inside the city
when it was walled up. Any and all attempts at rescue ended
horrifically and so the survivors were abandoned, left to
fend for themselves in a decaying wreck of a metropolis
infested with the undead. But the forsaken citizens of
Zombie City have a lone defender, a hulking man of few words
and extremely violent tendencies, the only man brave (or
foolish) enough to walk around Zombie City by himself, the
Zombie Killer called Renzo.
The very first Zombie City story, The Way Out,
was a five-page story written for, as I mentioned, the
Stumblebum Studios Anthology and was beautifully
illustrated by a homeless man for ten bucks
my good buddy,
Dave
Sherrill. It wasn’t until after I had written The Way
Out that I realized I wanted to do even more stories
with Renzo and Zombie City. Thus, I began plotting out a
three-issue mini-series called Down Among the Dead Men.
In this story a group of elite and highly-trained
mercenaries are paid to help a former New York City resident
find his family, who were trapped inside when the walls
around Zombie City went up. Needless to say, things go
horribly awry and it isn’t long before Renzo shows up to
save the day.
This story is going to be wall-to-wall action, horror,
explosions and zombies and I can’t wait to start writing it!
I’ve got the basic plot sorted in my head, but there’s some
research to do (zombie research!) and details that need to
be fleshed out. Hopefully I can start writing this one soon
before Dave gets too busy or too famous to draw it. Cause
I’d hate to have to do something horrible to him. Oops, I
mean… I’d hate to have to find another artist.
It’s worth mentioning that recently
Dana completely cleaned the floor with my creative ass
when he told me about a zombie story that came to him in a
dream. In a dream!! I won’t go into the details of his story
but let’s just say that his idea kicks the crap out of
Zombie City. I am extremely jealous that he was able to
come up with such a cool and unique take on the zombie
genre. Oh, how I hate him. But I wish him
the best of luck with his idea. Not to self: kill Dana and
steal his zombie idea.
Gun Slave
This is one of those stories where the title actually came
before the story itself. I just thought Gun Slave
sounded cool. Doesn’t it? Yer damn right! The story evolved
from there and pretty soon I found myself plotting out a
sprawling, epic sci-fi adventure tale involving a
genetically engineered bodyguard (a gun slave… hey, that’s
the title!) who rejects his programming and goes on the run.
Based on a true story. Nah, it’s not really. But some of it
is based on my years as a gunrunner in Africa. Or is it?
What was I talking about? Oh yeah.
Well, there’s much more to the story than that one sentence
lets on. Gun Slave is actually pretty complex,
featuring a terrible conspiracy, corrupt governments and
insurgents, with the whole galaxy as a backdrop and lots of
killer robots, hi-tech assassins, UFO’s crashing into
continent-spanning cities and talking cats that are also
alcoholic priests. But I’ll spare you all of the
details. You’ll just have to read it when it comes out like
everyone else.
The biggest challenge to this story is creating this whole
new world completely from scratch. It really has no basis in
reality whatsoever, being that it takes place hundreds and
hundreds of years from now. So I’ve been spending a lot of
time trying to imagine the technology, the language, the
cultural and religious aspects of such a distant future
place. At this point I have a pretty detailed back-story and
an idea of where things are headed. But there are still lots
and lots of holes to fill. I’ll try and keep you guys
updated as things on Gun Slave progress.
I’m probably going to be looking for an artist for this book
at some point. Anyone who’s interested can
email.
And those are just three of the ideas that are currently
wreaking havoc in my pretty little fractured psyche! I’ve
actually got some pretty good ideas for two or three graphic
novels that I’m plotting out at the moment. One is about
vampires, which is a subject I don’t believe has ever been
touched upon in comics before. Actually, it’s a
heist/caper story involving vampires so that’s
something. Another is about a Flash Gordon-type hero who’s
pissed off a lot of people throughout the galaxy and now
it’s catching up with him. And finally there’s my “military
vs. aliens in space” story, which isn’t quite as contrived
as it sounds. Maybe I’ll tell you more about those books
soon.
Currently I’m writing a fifteen-page comic for
Free Comic Book Day. I’m probably going to have to draw
this one too, which is a prospect that frightens the hell
outta me. I must be out of my freakin’ mind. Especially with
FCBD just a little over a month away. I guess I better stop
yappin’ about it and put this column to bed.
There’s comics to write!
Quick Bits
Warning! Nothing you read here in Quick Bits should be
considered FACT until it actually happens. Which it might
not. How do you know I’m not just making all this crap up? I
could, you know. You’ve been warned!
- A 2-page comic that I wrote and Dave Sherrill
illustrated has been accepted for publication in
Young American Comics
2006 BIZMAR Anthology. BIZMAR stands for Bunny,
Alien, Insect, Monkey, Alien, Robot, all of which must
be included in your story to make it into the book. The
Anthology is due out in stores this summer.
- Despite my predictions and threats of suicide, the
writer for Action Comics is still being kept top
secret. The new creative team won’t actually debut until
October, giving DC plenty of time to build the suspense.
But with the big con season just starting I’m sure the
announcement will come sooner rather than later. Or
else!
- Paul Jenkins is now the proud father of a baby boy,
Torak the Slayer… I mean, Jack Richard Marveldotcom
Jenkins. I think the Marveldotcom part is a joke… I
hope. Cause I was plannin’ on using that for my kid,
dammit! Jenkins has been teasing the event for a while
over in his friggin’ excellent column,
Flogging A Dead Horse. You should go read it… it’s
almost as good as my column!
- Jenkins also revealed a new project called
Sidekick, from
Desperado Publishing. The story involves a young
pizza delivery who decides to become a sidekick to four
superheroes in order to cover his bills. Chris Moreno
will handle the art on the series.
- Marvel Comics announced a whole slew of creators who
have signed exclusive contracts with the publisher,
including Zeb Wells, Skottie Young, Tommy Lee Edwards
and Yanick Paquette.
- The biggest name announced as Marvel’s latest
exclusive creator was J. Scott Campbell. Campbell
revealed that, once he is finished working on
Wildsiderz for Wildstorm, he will be working on a
new Spiderman series with writer Jeph Loeb. Expect the
series to hit shelves on the 13th of NEVER! God, that
guy is slow! He makes Bryan Hitch look like the Flash on
crank.
- The Ultimate Universe meets the Squadron Supreme
Universe in the nine-issue Ultimate Power
mini-series from Marvel in October. The series will be
written by Brian Michael Bendis, who will handle the
first three issues, J. Michael Straczynski, who will
write the middle three and Jeph Loeb, who will write the
last three issues. An artist has yet to be announced.
I’m guessing it might be Michael Turner who signed a
contract last year to draw a mini-series for Marvel.
- Marc Silvestri revealed that he will be working on
an unnamed Ultimate Universe comic with Brian Michael
Bendis. This project is a result of the recent deal
signed between Marvel and Silvestri’s Top Cow
Productions that allows Marvel to dip into Top Cow’s
talent pool for their books.
- Marvel is teaming with Bungie Studios to produce the
Halo Graphic Novel featuring the work of Moebius,
Phil Hale, Ed Lee, Tsutomo Nihei, Jay Faerber, Andrew
Robinson, Simon Bisley and Lee Hammock. The 128-page
hardcover book is slated for release this summer.
- Jack Kirby’s daughter Lisa Kirby is working on a new
project for Marvel called Jack Kirby’s Galactic
Bounty Hunters. The series is a creator-owned book
that will feature a number of characters and concepts
created by Jack Kirby.
- The X-Men: Civil War mini-series creative
team was announced as writer David Hine, new Marvel
exclusive artist Yanick Paquette and cover artist Juan
Doe.
- In an interview regarding his upcoming Midnighter
ongoing series with artist Chris Sprouse, Garth Ennis
revealed that he will be working on a Battler Britton
series (part of the IPC/Wildstorm line) and possibly
another Kev series.
- Robert Kirkman and Phil Hester’s new Marvel series,
Ant-Man, will feature a brand new character
taking on the mantle of Ant-Man. Henry Pym will play a
large (hee-hee) role in the series, however.
- Writer Matt Fraction is working on a new
Punisher: War Journal ongoing series with artist
Ariel Olivetti. The series will spin out of events in
Marvel’s Civil War mini-series and return the
Punisher as an active participant in the Marvel Universe
as he begins targeting supervillains. Garth Ennis’
excellent Punisher series, published under MAX
(Marvel’s mature readers line), will continue to see the
Punisher operating in his own little corner of the
world, separate from the rest of the Marvel U.
- Paul Dini will be writing a new comic for Top Cow
called Madam Mirage. No artist was named for the
series.
- Garth Ennis and Darick Robertson are working on a
new ongoing series for Wildstorm, entitled
The Boys. The 60-issue, 5-year series will
revolve around a group of government operatives who are
sent in when the superheroes of the world get out of
control. The series will be self-contained and not
linked to any established continuity. In an interview
about the series Robertson revealed that he was feeling
burned out working at Marvel, being yanked from one book
to another and not being able to give any one project
his best effort. Which probably explains why the art on
Fury: Peacemaker sucks so badly.
- A new ongoing series from DC, called Tranquility,
will deal wih a planned retirement community for
superheroes. The series is written by Gail Simone, with
art by Neil Googe.
NEXT WEEK: I went to All-Con on Saturday and it
was awesome! Truly it is the party con. You can read all
about the debauchery next week! Plus you’ll get to see what
is quite possibly one of the nerdiest things I have ever
purchased. And I bought ALL of the plush Super-Pets!
Send me hate mail at
thesuperleezard@yahoo.com
Read more stupid crap I write at
www.livejournal.com/users/superleezard
Check out my (semi) daily comic, Der Wundervolle Bean, at
www.livejournal.com/users/der_magic_bean
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